Worst opening lines!

the "art" of good writing ,by description is hard to define as there are no set rules for ART...there are no limitations or parameters or even logic that can be applied to it...it's a point of view,or the writer's imagery that may or may not move you...well here are a few opening lines that definitely will:-

(1) "As a scientist,Throckmortan knew that if he were ever to break wind in the sound chamber he would never hear the end of it">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

(2)"Just beyond the Narrows the river widens">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

(3)"With a curvaceous figure that Venus would have envied,a tanned unblemished oval face framed with lustreous thick brown hair ,deep azure blue eyes fringed with long black lashes,perfect teeth that vied for competition, and a small straight nose, Marilee had a beauty that defied description.">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

(4)"Andre , a peasant , had only one thing on his mind as he crept along the east wall: "Andre creep...Andre creep... Andre creep.">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

(5)"Stanley looked quite bored and somewhat detached,but then penguins often do.">>>>>>>>

(6)"Mike Hardware was the kind of private eye who din't know the meaning of the word "fear",a man who could laugh in the face of danger and spit in the eye of death--in short , a moron with suicidal tendencies.">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

the penguin one is my favourite!!!