bolo bolo kuchh toh bolo
jaldi jaldi apna bag kholo
bebo ki behen ka naam hai lolo
mujhe mil gaya hai mera POLO!
Monday, July 27, 2009
Pawan Muktasan
serves me right ...i taunted u guys about farting and thats all ive been doing since last night!
i have a slight guthy renker in my stomach. but thanks to my yoga , ab aisa nahin hoga.
i would also like to thank my dear friens mr. lomo til and mr p. hara for being with me in my time of duress.
so now that i have dealt with my gaseous state of affairs i would like to ask u some questions. they're not as much as questions as they are pointless wonderings...
"aur phir gaadi hawaa se baatein karne lagi"
kya baatein ?
"ye geedar bhabkeeyaan kissi aur ko dena!"
who geedar and what the F#$K is bhabkee??
"main aapka shukriya ada karna chahta hoon"
will that translate as i would like to be thankful to you in Half?!?
Recently i realised that people had stopped recognizing bizzare when they saw it.
while walking out of one of the movies i watched recently i glanced upon a poster of an upcoming film called kissan or something and it showed two male protagonists , one dressed as a kissan and the other as a cowboy. what was bizzare about this ? the line above the kissan read " son of the soil" and the one above the cowboy said " son of a gun!"
and ppl walked past it without recognizing the bizzare!
will i go for this movie you ask me? to be honest i'd rather watch Guthy.
i have a slight guthy renker in my stomach. but thanks to my yoga , ab aisa nahin hoga.
i would also like to thank my dear friens mr. lomo til and mr p. hara for being with me in my time of duress.
so now that i have dealt with my gaseous state of affairs i would like to ask u some questions. they're not as much as questions as they are pointless wonderings...
"aur phir gaadi hawaa se baatein karne lagi"
kya baatein ?
"ye geedar bhabkeeyaan kissi aur ko dena!"
who geedar and what the F#$K is bhabkee??
"main aapka shukriya ada karna chahta hoon"
will that translate as i would like to be thankful to you in Half?!?
Recently i realised that people had stopped recognizing bizzare when they saw it.
while walking out of one of the movies i watched recently i glanced upon a poster of an upcoming film called kissan or something and it showed two male protagonists , one dressed as a kissan and the other as a cowboy. what was bizzare about this ? the line above the kissan read " son of the soil" and the one above the cowboy said " son of a gun!"
and ppl walked past it without recognizing the bizzare!
will i go for this movie you ask me? to be honest i'd rather watch Guthy.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Charry On for better softer and younger looking skin!
this page has been set in such a way that the latest article appears first ... hence this piece has been written after the one appearing below this. This is set in such a way for you ppl. cos i know u are a bunch of no good lazy arses that won't even shift your bum to let out a fart. although i find that really helps. unless the chair your bum is sitting on has holes ofcourse. like the cane chairs. if the chair cane then u can.
the reason i said all this is cos i just wanted to add to the topic written about here belows.
there is a show on some channels that is a similar format tele shopping thing. but wat fascinates me is the name of this show. it not only fascinates me but moves me. it affects parts of my brain. i get this overwhelming urge to take my arm and shove it inside the set top box and destroy it forever. it's called Guthy Renker!
yuk.
anyways, yesterday due to strong suicidal tendancies i watched it and was amazed at what they were trying to sell. they were trying to sell a foot spa thing that would remove toxins from your body through your feet and help improve your dancing!
please do not be amazed just yet...it also helps improve your relationship with your spouse and helps you be a better parent!
all this by soaking your feet in water in this home foot spa !
i better stop talking about this cos, if you like this shit on tv , then i fear the only place my foot will be spa-ing will be in my mouth!
the reason i said all this is cos i just wanted to add to the topic written about here belows.
there is a show on some channels that is a similar format tele shopping thing. but wat fascinates me is the name of this show. it not only fascinates me but moves me. it affects parts of my brain. i get this overwhelming urge to take my arm and shove it inside the set top box and destroy it forever. it's called Guthy Renker!
yuk.
anyways, yesterday due to strong suicidal tendancies i watched it and was amazed at what they were trying to sell. they were trying to sell a foot spa thing that would remove toxins from your body through your feet and help improve your dancing!
please do not be amazed just yet...it also helps improve your relationship with your spouse and helps you be a better parent!
all this by soaking your feet in water in this home foot spa !
i better stop talking about this cos, if you like this shit on tv , then i fear the only place my foot will be spa-ing will be in my mouth!
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
reality bites!
on a normal day by the time i get home, and am done with dinner i have little "energy/ enthusiasm/or will" left....to do anything. ( don't worry i'm not writing to ask for some magic rudraksh that can energise and rejeuvenate my lifestyle like you see on home shopping ) hence it's understandable for most of you (except few of my crazed female fans) that i write very rarely nowadays.
"But then what prompted you to write today?" asked mrs. malhotra with a quizzical expression on her face and a tiny smile trying to escape from below her hair lined lips, quivering with an unending desire to fornicate with my fingers right there in front of the judge.
Nahin Mee Lard! (read- no! my Lord)
sorry..i strayed away.
haan so i was saying that i was flipping channels today and suddenly i could not take it anymore. the ever dwindling standards of television programming on our national network is beyond apalling! it's afalling it's abawling !
in the name of reality shows they have the ugliness of the world in all shapes and sizes covered in all the colours possible with noises blaring out of them and their background enough to make a turd twist in disgust!
ok for our more sensitive readers i apologise for the graphic nature of this article.
there are people who are willing to come on tv and make such complete asses of themselves...and for what? a prize of 10 thousand rupees and a few seconds on air?
so basically i'm either watching tv in it's lowest form in the name of reality tv or regressive looking / sounding soaps or channels that are trying to sell you stuff!
which by the way is amazing.
they're all trying to sell you products that can change your life! by either melting your fat on the side of your tummy or changing your luck by wearing a pendant or even helping you get rid of your hunched back....all from the comfort of your home! to validate these products they have firangs speaking with desi voice overs which is so well done that it could fool anyone into believing that these people have actually tried them!
So what are you waiting for ? take that remote and click your life away!
Ps: on a hindi news channel the other day i saw, that the fish that's in your kitchen could have dynamite in it! no points for guessing the name of the channel.
"But then what prompted you to write today?" asked mrs. malhotra with a quizzical expression on her face and a tiny smile trying to escape from below her hair lined lips, quivering with an unending desire to fornicate with my fingers right there in front of the judge.
Nahin Mee Lard! (read- no! my Lord)
sorry..i strayed away.
haan so i was saying that i was flipping channels today and suddenly i could not take it anymore. the ever dwindling standards of television programming on our national network is beyond apalling! it's afalling it's abawling !
in the name of reality shows they have the ugliness of the world in all shapes and sizes covered in all the colours possible with noises blaring out of them and their background enough to make a turd twist in disgust!
ok for our more sensitive readers i apologise for the graphic nature of this article.
there are people who are willing to come on tv and make such complete asses of themselves...and for what? a prize of 10 thousand rupees and a few seconds on air?
so basically i'm either watching tv in it's lowest form in the name of reality tv or regressive looking / sounding soaps or channels that are trying to sell you stuff!
which by the way is amazing.
they're all trying to sell you products that can change your life! by either melting your fat on the side of your tummy or changing your luck by wearing a pendant or even helping you get rid of your hunched back....all from the comfort of your home! to validate these products they have firangs speaking with desi voice overs which is so well done that it could fool anyone into believing that these people have actually tried them!
So what are you waiting for ? take that remote and click your life away!
Ps: on a hindi news channel the other day i saw, that the fish that's in your kitchen could have dynamite in it! no points for guessing the name of the channel.
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